Thursday, December 30, 2010

Live Review: THE FRUSTRATIONS

BRISBANE HOTEL, HOBART

The Brisbane Hotel is alive with the ceaseless chatter of locals and interstate Christmas ex-locals catching up, drinking heavily and all here to witness the first gig in seven years for one-time flagship of the celebrated Hobart mid-to-late-nineties ‘scene’ The Frustrations.

Unlike so many other bands seeking to reform, the songs written by singer and guitarist Julian Teakle and drummer Mike Harris were wise beyond their years when they were written, so revisiting them is no mere exercise in nostalgia and many pack a surprising punch. Always a fan of unfettered honesty, Teakle counters the expected heckling and banter with ease. ‘Hi we’re the Frustrations...from a million years ago,’ he says with a wry chuckle between opener My New Shirt and Volcano. Teakle finishes the gig with a humourless ‘Now fuck off and spend your gift vouchers’ over blazing squalls of feedback suggesting that some sort of catharsis has been earned.

Affection is always matched with frustration at living in your hometown, and few songwriters have explored this with such blunt precision as Julian Teakle. The fact that he writes about Hobart is going to limit their relevance, but their coruscating sincerity can’t be denied, and tonight was a blinding reminder.

Knowing exactly how to set these paeans to the streets outside the venue, Harris has one drum style that involves the need to hit every drum on every song and this vocal-cue-triggered clutter sets Teakle’s stark guitar hacks off perfectly and allows them to capture that elusive beast; a simple sound to call your own.

The sonically reductive quality of The Frustrations is the most notably dated aspect of their sound. Few bands would have the bravery to play a 90-minute set with just a drum kit, guitar and occasionally used distortion pedal; no reverb, no distractions.

One Trick Pony Show is a languid mid-set highlight, Ricochet is ferocious and local classic What Erica Told Me sparks a sing-along with its brief verses (I love you / You’re dropped), before Teakle drily intones: ‘That was a song I wrote when I was 18, here is a far more sophisticated song I wrote when I was 28’, and enters Wilderness.

Teakle seems to have nothing to prove, won’t be thrown by vicious heckling and doesn’t exude the submerged need to seek approval that was an essential contributor to the energy needed to keep a band alive. There are dud notes, missed beats, a ferociously unpredictable cameo from Andrew Harper on 21 and the realisation that there are a lot of songs they can choose from.

Sonic Advisor, unreleased song Hey Death and Girl in the Purple Dress all shine, inspire some gentle slamming and are devoured by the audience, many of whom were definitely too young to have seen them before. Thankfully, there was never a chance of this being too polished, and like all good reunions, new material was played. Possibly best of all though, talk of the forthcoming release of a ‘lost’ album and plans for mainland shows.

Monday, December 20, 2010

2010 Losing Your Cool: The Year Round-Up

Elsewhere, it's been written that 2010 was a year of musical disappointments. No instant classics (though some, including me, would argue Kanye's album is one for the ages) such as last year's Merriweather Post Pavilion (though that album's influence can be found throughout releases from new bands this year) and a lack of a uniting release like Funeral, In An Aeroplane Over The Sea or Sound of Silver. There were some interesting returns to form for some old favourites (Belle and Sebastian, Ninetynine), some fresh surprises (Best Coast, The Drums) and a few overhyped disappointments (M.I.A, LCD Soundsystem, Arcade Fire).

Few would agree with my pick of Los Campesinos's release in the first week of 2010 as Album of 2010 but for me it held everything that a great album should. Ambition, risk-taking, a refusal to take easy options, honesty, unforced rebellion, breathtaking bravery, a total disregard for 'cool' and a wild, barely-controlled vital energy. You can map a journey from adolescent concerns on their debut through to intelligent self-reflection from their second release and an empowering facing up to adulthood and responsibility on this release. LC have no time for immature 30-somethings which Hollywood has recently fallen for. Though far from faultless, even when they stumble they do it with nobility and while striving for greatness.

Elsewhere it seemed there was no band in Melbourne without at least one floor tom more than comes with a drum kit. Rat Vs Possum, Love Connection, Pikelet, everyone who made a half-decent album seemed to feel the need to accentuate rhythm with a 14x16 inch drum. Whether this sticks around remains to be seen but there were an uncommonly fantastic amount of visually as well as aurally engaging gigs this year and it seems that 'tribal rhythms' along with hipster baiting were the defining flavours of music in Melbourne, as well as a gradual shift towards musicianship which is a welcome change from the style-driven flash-in-the-pans of recent years. Commercially though it was insubstantial style (Lady Gaga, Ke$ha etc.) over stylish substance (Janelle Monae, Aloe Blacc), though of course one man drove an ego-charged tractor over all trends and preconceptions and showed that fearless ingenuity still exists, and sells records.

Overall, the undermining of hipsters and increasing use of Twitter etc peels away layers of artifice and pretense while forcing facades to run deeper. As a result, the loss of superficial cool means that talent has to shine through if attention is going to remain which means that the hunt for the next big thing is harder than ever. 2011 looks like it's going to get exciting with releases from Bjork, Three Month Sunset (now Lowtide), Aphex Twin, Cut Copy and even maybe The Avalanches (a VERY close source tells me that mixing is finishing this summer!), I think I can start on my Top Ten Albums of 2011 list already.

TOP TEN ALBUMS
1. Romance Is Boring LOS CAMPESINOS!
2. I See The Sign SAM AMIDON
3. My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy KANYE WEST
4. High Violet THE NATIONAL
5. Innerspeaker TAME IMPALA
6. Love Connection LOVE CONNECTION
7. Here’s The Tender Coming THE UNTHANKS
8. Teen Dream BEACH HOUSE
9. Bande Magnetique NINETYNINE
10. Crazy For You BEST COAST

TOP TEN SONGS
1. Tightrope JANELLE MONAE
2. No Horizon THREE MONTH SUNSET
3. Runaway KANYE WEST
4. Woods NINETYNINE
5. Lost Cities of Gold LOVE CONNECTION
6. Bloodbuzz Ohio THE NATIONAL
7. I Didn’t See it Coming BELLE AND SEBASTIAN
8. Bummer ALEKS AND THE RAMPS
9. You’d Better Mind SAM AMIDON
10. Not In Love CRYSTAL CASTLES WITH ROBERT SMITH

BEST NEW ARTISTS
1. Janelle Monae
2. Love Connection
3. Tame Impala
4. Best Coast
5. K

TOP FIVE INTERNATIONAL ARTIST GIGS
1. Al Green PALAIS THEATRE
2. Jonsi SPLENDOUR IN THE GRASS
3. Pavement PALACE
4. Svavar Knutur WESLEY ANNE
5. Jens Lekman MY BACKYARD

TOP FIVE AUSTRALIAN ARTIST GIGS
1. Richard In Your Mind, Rat Vs Possum, Silver White Magic NORTHCOTE SOCIAL CLUB
2. Love Connection CAMP A LOW HUM
3. Pikelet, Love Connection, World’s End Press NORTHCOTE SOCIAL CLUB
4. Paul Kelly SPLENDOUR IN THE GRASS
5. Denim Owl CAMP A LOW HUM

TOP FIVE RADIO SHOWS/PODCASTS
1. Mark Kermode and Simon Mayo’s Film Reviews BBC RADIO FIVE LIVE
2. Lime Champions RRR
3. Transference RRR
4. Wait, Wait Don’t Tell Me NPR
5. Filmspotting CHICAGO PUBLIC RADIO

TOP FIVE TV SHOWS
1. Mad Men AMC
2. 30 Rock NBC
3. SBS World Cup coverage SBS
4. Bizzare Foods TRAVEL CHANNEL
5. At The Movies ABC

TOP FIVE MOVIES
1. Inception
2. Toy Story 3
3. The White Ribbon
4. The Red Chapel
5. Animal Kingdom

THE EMPEROR'S NEW CLOTHES AWARD
Arcade Fire’s The Suburbs. From uniting millions of disaffected youth and finding hope in death on one of the albums of the millennium thus far (Funeral), to gloriously wallowing in American nihilism on the brilliant Neon Bible, to whinging about ‘the kids’ and making suburban boredom sound pompous and unengaging.

MOST OVERLOOKED ALBUM OF 2009
Always On THE NATIVE CATS

QUOTE OF THE YEAR
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ (B-flat drone): From vuvuzelas, from iPhones, from people pretending to be vuvuzelas, from Youtube, from Google...2010 in a tone.

PREDICTION FOR 2011 
Harry Potter to provoke tears, world leaders to ignore climate science, The Social Network and The Kings Speech to win lots of Oscars, Animal Collective to disappoint while releasing a still-fantastic album, grime and dubstep to finally break through into the American mainstream via a white male artist, everyone to get the fuck over Lady Gaga while Bjork's next album is a glorious return to form.

Friday, December 17, 2010

Live Review: THE TRIANGLES, VICUNA COAT, ROBOT CHILD

GRACE DARLING

With the stiff competition elsewhere in the city tonight it’s impressive to find the Grace’s bandroom nearly full, and the crowd clearly excited at the prospect of seeing The Triangles play their first Melbourne show in over three years. It’s perhaps even more impressive that a massive portrait of Bill Hicks mysteriously propped sidestage rarely distracts from proceedings.

Kicking off the night is Robot Child who have the unusual ability of wearing sharp 50s suits while playing a very 90s-sounding mix of metal riffs, funky piano and soaring grunge-esque vocals. While they do what they do really well, are super talented and charismatic dudes (particularly singer Jeff Wortman and guitarist Waleed Aly) and can likely play Throwing Copper and Blood Sugar Sex Magik note for note, it’s hard to imagine who has a yearning to hear their particular version of rule-breaking rock. Still with the grunge revival surely months away, who knows?

Vicuna Coat are a band who should be getting a lot more attention for their wholly original mix of indie rock, country psychedelia and seamless integration of sitar, symbiotic vocal harmonies and ukulele. Songs segue and rushes and lulls come and go as guitarists Edwin Jungwirth and Gordon Blake seem to telepathically work off each other to create singeing, smouldering lead lines and arpeggios. Whether they’d want more attention is hard to say, as there are no egos at work here. Songs cover road trips to Bluesfest (Red Devil Park), a dog, from the dog’s perspective (Kyra) and the wry depreciatory banter from stunning vocalist Kat Winduss. The band can only treat the audience as friends. ‘Stick around to hear one of my favourite bands of all time’ says Blake signing off.

The Triangles soon assemble themselves, their instruments, but mainly their props. And boy have they got some. Not content with catchy indie pop melodies, simple chugging chords, tinkling synths and a seemingly bottomless suitcase of random melodic instruments, there are top hats, portraits, balloons, plates of chocolate and coconut slice, Viking horn hats (passed off as bull horns) and a Zorro cape and mask. Each song seems to require a small-scale production, as massive word bubbles appear around singer Eleanor Horsburgh’s head during You Got Me All Worked Up before the aforementioned Spanish props accompany the closing Other Side of the Pillow. Of course the Spanish-chart-topping and Jetstar-ad-soundtracking Applejack is a highlight, but it’s their new song The Economist which indicates that it’s unlikely to be three years before their next Melbourne gig.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Live Review: THE FIELD, QUA, KHARKIN

EAST BRUNSWICK CLUB

Though it’s uncommon to see a band like The Field in a setting like the East Brunswick Club, it shouldn’t be. Audience response tonight shows there is nothing like Swedish minimalist techno played live to rustle up some enthusiastic shuffling from the crossed-arm brigade that mass to Meredith sideshows.

Kicking things off with what at first seems to be the tired cliché of live electronica – a casually dressed dude bending over a MacBook Pro – Kharkin soon dispenses with these preconceptions and starts beating an Alesis Control Pad over some silvery chords, lets some space slip between his dense blocks of urbanic atmospherics and rules.

Having been lurking on the fringes and occasionally bursting to the centre of whatever musical communities will have him (i.e. most of them), Qua aka Cornel Wilczek has been steadily amassing a fanbase since he crept into consciousnesses five years ago. Tonight we get warm pulses, geeky glasses, choir-like synth pads, a devilish ‘tach and a dusting of amp-driven distortion over everything. Soon progressing through aerosol bursts of hi-hats, Derrick May-like hard beats before strapping on a guitar, it seems as if he’s trying to cram 100 ideas into each minute of the set, any second I’m expecting him to turn to us with a grin and say (a la Rob or Deane from the Curiosity Show) ‘keep up kids!’ Granted, five minutes of this would be enough to set James Murphy on course for another two albums but here Wilczek moves as if he had no pressures at all. AiH’s James Cecil joins for some synth drumming mid-gig and it all goes down splendidly.

Curtains part to a sensually undulating stream of sine wave and pink noise and before us lie the four-piece techno reinterpreting machine of The Field. Beneath projections of outer Swedish suburbia shot from a train window Axel Willner and co deliver clipped beats, controlled compressed cycling chords, delicate chorus-laden guitar chops and some of the most wildly enthusiastic drumming ever to remain within the strict boundaries of techno rhythms. While visiting several high points of 2008’s From Here We Go To Sublime album the Field push much that is unfamiliar to the audience, which suits us fine. Though it’s the irredeemably exhilaratory highs of Over The Ice, Everyday and The Little Heart Beats So Fast that get people moving there isn’t a moment where the band are anything less than phenomenally tight and the vibe is less than euphoric; a stellar performance that leaves everyone wondering why there isn’t a merch desk and when they'll be back. Must have been killer at Meredith.

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Live Review: GIRLS, THE ANCIENTS

CORNER HOTEL

“I hope you’re appreciating the full brunt of our theatre training,’ deadpans Ancients singer  Jonathan Mitchell after another static and unemotional display. An inspired choice of support, The Ancients quiet an audience largely new to them and get a response louder than the bewitching sounds they send. Mitchell’s rabbit-in-the-headlights blinkless gaze when delivering lyrics is unsettling and forces wrapt attention on the band in a way that few performers manage, Jonathan Richman perhaps. Playing most of their recent Ancients 2 album, highlights include any song in which guitarist Mark Rodda’s fluid brittle trills are a driving point such as Marsh Tomb, Street Funk and a particularly rocking new song, as Mitchell’s understated lyrics are largely lost in the thickly-populated room even if his intensity and songwriting nous is unmistakable.

Half an hour later, red curtains part to reveal Girls, another five-piece, this time with bunches of flowers gaffered to the mic stands and strewn on amps, and the opening bars of Laura playing to squealing fans. Songwriter Christopher Owens is at once a culmination of a dozen influences and yet a clearly talented songwriter and guitarist. With his newly cropped hair (as reminiscent of Jesus and Mary Chain’s Reid brothers as the last half of the set sounds), Owens’ slightly shrunk turtleneck sweater gathers at his throat, adding to the ugly-urgency effect of his facial contortions that accompany each squeezed vocal outburst. Often hopping on one leg, occasionally rolling on the floor or playing his red Rickenbacker between his legs, it’s a strange blend of 50s clean-cut rock star and new wave influenced pop that this band push and, unarguably, they do it well. Far more than a few memorable hooks and some set filler, Girls dispense with the clean, brief songs early on and let lose once they know we're on side. Lust For Life nearly disappears beneath the preceding anthemic outro of Hellhole Ratrace and the protracted glorious fuzzfest that is a segued Morning Light/Heartbreaker/Carolina is surprisingly abrasive for a band so obsessed with melody.

Owens clearly loves the bell-clear sparkling guitar tone and both he and birthday boy guitarist Ryan Lynch mess with it, sometimes echoing each other’s parts with tonal shifts but never straying too far from chiming precision. Bassist Chet White’s (Edgar Winter autographed) bass malfunctions and holds things up for a little while, but by the time the solo encore Oh My Life ends the set with a spellbinding, shimmering pin-drop-quiet close there is only glee spilling through the crowd, surging for the merch desk. 

Sunday, December 5, 2010

THERE BUT FOR THE GRACE - An interview with Grace Woodroofe

With a voice that overshadows the remarkable story behind her debut album GRACE WOODROOFE's greatest achievement may be not inspiring jealousy in every singer-songwriter reading this, muses ANDY HAZEL.


Picture it. You’re a teenage girl growing up in Perth with your heart set on being a musician. You make some shyly recorded home demos and pass them to a friend who happens to pass them on to her brother, who happens to be Heath Ledger. Heath emails you from LA and says he loves your songs and asks if you would like to visit and let him introduce you to some industry friends. You get permission from the school principal to take a week off school, go to LA, make a lot of friends, captivate Ben Harper, he asks you to support him on an American tour and books you into a studio to make your first album. Yeah, right.

“I didn’t know she’d send it to him at all,” says Woodroofe of her friend who kick-started this unlikely chain of events. “I gave her two songs, and a few days later she says she’s sent it to Heath, who I’d never met before. I was 17 when I first went. I came back, graduated, and went back for six months by myself, that’s when we recorded the album.”

On the eve of the release of Always Want Woodroofe is back home and remarkably unfazed by what 2011 may hold. “Perth must have something to do with why I’ve not been overwhelmed,” she says matter-of-factly. “Working and meeting people in LA…I’ve never been awestruck by things going on around me. Perth is great place to grow up in terms of the music because it’s so isolated and there is so little to do here. There’s no outside influence so you develop things on your own. I’m staying in Perth at the moment but I’m never here for that long,” she says pondering the future. “I’m expecting to move to Sydney at some point and I felt really at home in LA. I made some incredible friends, and the community feel of the underground music scene is really cool. I felt so embraced there. In Perth growing up and going to school, it was always weird to know that I wasn’t going to go to uni and that I was going to be a musician. Everyone you meet in LA is a musician or an actor; it’s such a creative community, and it was so great to meet people who shared my goals. I definitely want to move there at some point, Ben is there, and Relentless7, we hang out a lot.”

As freakishly lucky as this story is, there is one factor that is perhaps the real reason for all this fortune; her voice. It’s hard not to be captivated by it and harder not to lean on lazy comparisons to describe it, such as ‘a female Tom Waits’. It’s something Woodroofe also struggles to relate, “I just sort of take things other people say about it,” she says laughing. “I love Tom Waits but I don’t know if I would say that I sound like him. Some people say Nick Cave or a cross between him and Karen Dalton. I was listening to a lot of her and Phoebe Snow growing up, Nina Simone and stuff. Singing was instinctive and very natural thing but my voice has developed as years go on, it’s like a boy going through puberty or something,” she says with another laugh. “The more I sing and perform the more I learn to control it and manipulate it.”

Her voice fits perfectly with the dark themes and subjects of Always Want and the album confounds the opinion people might form from simply judging her by her picture. “I had a strong vision before I went into the studio and I recorded the album before I had any proper management or label,” she says lightly, “I imagined the songs would turn out this way, with a heaviness about them.”

Live Review: PATINKA CHA CHA, SEAGULL

THE WORKERS CLUB


A venue free of sound insulation,  bands get a bright and garish sound playing in the Workers Club, and this works surprisingly well for the groups playing tonight, both of whom hide their accomplished musicianship in twisting and unpredictable songs. 

Chris Bolton makes a case for being one of the more fearless singer-songwriters in town with his moniker Seagull now signifying a four piece band who explore the outer edges of indie rock with piercing vocals, heavy rhythms and textured melodica. Bolton has transformed from an intelligent, bookish wilfully low-fi singer-songwriter into a charismatic near-experimentalist pushing his Velvets chugs into dark stabs of pop. With Patinka Cha Cha member Ruby Green providing the melodica lines which blend beautifully with his textured stabs of the guitar, the band move easily from elegant and slightly sinister dynamics to My Disco-like sledgehammer blocks of rhythm. For a guy strumming a broken acoustic a year ago this blazingly charismatic transition makes Whitley’s seem tame.

Rather than finding a rhythm and driving it into the ground, Patinka Cha Cha play with the idea of what songs can be. A typical one messes with the meter, skips from effervescent horn blasts to a fluid melodic guitar break before crashing into a five-part vocal-led outro and offering the delicious proposition of not knowing where a song will go next. Sounding entirely unlike any other band yet with the horn-led rhythmic fluidity of late 70s British combo Pigbag, Patinka Cha Cha are a dazzling seven-piece and prove Natasha Rose is a disarmingly shy bandleader and blisteringly exciting guitarist. Hiding swathes of warm, untreated jazz-influenced guitar virtuosity amidst danceable beats and explosions of synth pad warmth, there is breathtakingly unique mix of musicality and pop nous, all the more amazing for the youth of all involved.

Despite the dynamic shifts, several girls are inspired to do swoopy dancing, the room is nearly packed and the thermometer cracks the high 30s which all lends this show and this band an exciting ‘now is their time’ edge. Whether PCC fall on the right side of indie or are deemed by those with radio playlisting power to be too imaginative, too jazz influenced, too unpredictable or just uninterested in the opportunities on offer remains to be seen, but either way, Patinka Cha Cha are one of the most exciting bands 2010 has yet offered. The fact that they’ve already outgrown the EP they spent tonight promoting is another reason to check them out sooner rather than later because there’s really no knowing what’s next.

Sunday, October 31, 2010

Live Review: TESSA AND THE TYPECAST

GRACE DARLING

From the laughing packs of similarly-dressed teens and twenty-somethings lining the street outside through the packs of twenty and thirty-somethings crowding around the bar, up the stairs and to the smartly-dressed and attentive audience, Tessa and the Typecast have drawn a big crowd for such a small band; and for good reason. Once Goodnight Owl’s breathless set of plaintive lulls and intense crescendos fades, the stage is set for something incredibly special to take place.

Counting my self as at least vaguely informed about the Melbourne music scene, I would have expected someone to have told me about this band sometime between the release of their debut EP in 2008 and tonight’s release of their first single. Seeing a band so accomplished, full of odd twisting arrangements, remarkable musicianship, from Ballarat and with an average age seemingly in the late teens, the phrase ‘expect big things’ seems almost redundant. Playing songs from their EP and from forthcoming release it is the two songs featured on their single Painter and Something I Saw which steal the evening and highlight what it is that is so remarkable about this band. Firstly, Tessa Pavilach’s voice and stage presence is marvellous and not in the least inhibited. The band’s dynamic-laden structures and assured playing mean that when things need to get sensitive they get very sensitive, and when insensitivity is required, that is well and truly what you get.

It’s these louder moments that suggest fans of female performers with quirky voices don’t need to bide time for their favourite singer’s next album when TAT are around. Kate Miller-Heidke, Washington, Regina Spektor and Florence and the Machine are all names that have been thrown around this band in the past, but these references really don’t do justice. While all are inventive, driven performers who happen to have a knack for delving into slow, sensitive arrangements with the same verve as when attacking showstopping high notes, the selling point here is the guile and fresh-faced group dynamic that TAT work so well.

With the packed room so keen to hear every note and the reception so warm that Tessa gives the name of her house as the location for the after party and invites us all, tonight’s performance suggests that Yamaha keyboard will be swapped for a Steinway sooner rather than later.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

BROADCAST NEWS - An interview with James Cargill of BROADCAST

With a love of experimental electronic pop that can be described as both ardent and consistent, JAMES CARGILL of British group BROADCAST sets ANDY HAZEL straight on the difficulties of inhabiting so structured and well-realised a world.


From an English country town, down an appropriately crackly and delayed phone line, comes the Brummie brogue of James Cargill, a man once a fifth and now half of electro multimedia group Broadcast. Resolutely British middle class in his recurring mention of monetary thrift and expense, and constantly in love with the escapades offered by an obsession with West Coast 1960s electronic experimentalism, Cargill and bandmate Trish Keegan have spent the last 15 years building a name associated with a resolute aesthetic.

Unusually for such a successful band there is one sole album that inspired their formation; the 1967 self-titled album by Californian experimental band The United States of America. 15 years ago Keegan described it as ‘a bible’, some things don’t change. “Yeah, I’ve never felt like it’s an album I’ve outgrown,” says Cargill with enthusiasm. “What they were trying to achieve with that record is still what I’d like to achieve; a balance of experimental song structure and electronic textures. It’s a great model for a band.”

Pursuing an unobtainable goal such as this is certainly a model for longevity and it's a path that has taken its toll on the band when it comes to members. “It’s just been me and Trish for a few years now,” he explains slowly. “People have always come and gone, me and Trish have always held it together. When we lost Roj [Stevens, keyboards], it was a bit of a blow. When we started, it was me, Trish and Roj. You can make it work…you have to work when someone leaves. You have to have a new project and change the sound of things,” he says in a tone that suggests things didn’t end amicably. “I think we’ve moved on from the Tender Buttons album,” he continues airily, “which we made just the two of us. Making that record we thought we didn’t need a drummer anymore, and being without one is isn’t too hard you know. I really like the sound of working with a drummer but suddenly it became difficult to work with them, and expensive. I would like to work with a drummer again, as long as they don’t charge anything.”

Drums weren’t an issue on Broadcast’s most recent album, which they made with long-time friend, artist and founder of British experimental magicians The Focus Group, Julian House. “We said we’d always do something together,” says Cargill of their collaborative effort Broadcast and The Focus Group Investigate Witch Cults of the Radio Age album. “Julian’s first ever record sleeve was our first ever single, so we had that history, and we’re so good at working with him. That album took us one month to do, it was the quickest thing we’ve ever done; which was weird because we’re so used to spending years on things,” he says jovially. “We’ll do some of it live, we try and integrate it with the other stuff we’re doing, and it can be difficult when it’s just the two of us as we have to bear in mind we can’t achieve what’s on the record.”

Through a famously laissez faire arrangement with their label Warp Records, the band have the freedom to move at their own pace. Starting out amidst the full-force of Britpop and lingering polished grunge, Broadcast were a beam from a cleaner, colder time, partly retro, partly futuristic. “At that time when we started there was a big period of guitar music," says Cargill evenly. "It was a pretty flat landscape, though there was a burgeoning electronic thing that really appealed to me. Part of that, was a bit of a Moog thing going on, like Stereolab and Beck as well. In interviews, they were name-checking a lot of records I really liked. Me and Julian used to go to record fairs at the time and discovered records by Bruce Hark, Silver Apples, The United States of America, Neu and so on. They were real outsiders but they were still trying to make pop records with different effects and textures - not kitsch throwaway pop - it still had a solid part to it and I wanted to start a band which brought together these textures and sounds.”

The band’s gradual evolution and icebergmanesque disintegration is not born from a lack of inspiration or work ethic, as Cargill explains slowly, “writing and playing in a band...it can be a painful thing to do. It’s hard to labour over something for so long. It is difficult a lot of the time. The idea with any art is to do it quickly and move on. The idea we had when we started still feels valid to us, the integration of song, form, texture, and electronic sounds. I do hear music that I think is kind of detailed like ours now and then, and it is important to me to make a habit of listening to new stuff. Me and Julian talked about this recently when we were listening to Dolphins Into the Future and Ducktails and Ariel Pink, we were asking 'how would you make that music as British band'? It would probably end up sounding like Doctor Who; it’d be brilliant. We talked about forming a band like that but instead of doing it you end up drifting off. It’s difficult when you’ve been around a while," he says slightly despondently, "because you don’t want to lose the aesthetic of things." 
Long a part of the both their influences as well as their own style is the effect of visual art and projections and art work accompanying their live shows. “We do have projections, we do them ourselves,” Cargill adds. “We used to have a projectionist but it got too expensive.”

With songs already featuring in films such as Morvern Callar and 21, there is clearly a strong influence of cinema on the band’s music and in return, the projections do more than just hark back to West Coast psychedelia. Their suitability for visual accompaniment begs the question 'why the band doesn’t feature more frequently in film soundtracks?', which elicits Cargill's most enthusiastic response yet. “It’s funny you should mention soundtracks actually, because we’ve just been talking about working with the guy who directed the film Katalina Varga [Peter Strickland]. His new film is about an Italian film studio and a British guy who goes to work on a soundtrack. There are elements of an occult in the film, and it soon becomes a film-within-a-film scenario. We’ve been asked us to work on that film within the film, to bring some elements into that. I absolutely loved Katalina Varga, but this new one is quite different to that.” Sounds perfect.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

SURVIVOR - An interview with Edwyn Collins

Via Postcard Records, Orange Juice and A Girl Like You, EDWYN COLLINS is a man with a fierce work ethic and a new album. ANDY HAZEL is in awe.

Edwyn Collins is frustrated. It might not come through in his day-to-day life, once he starts writing and singing, it’s all there. And, unlike most of us, he has a very good reason to be filled with impatience. The victim of a stroke in 2005, another five days later, and a staphylococcal infection following the highly risky operation to insert a titanium plate in his head, Collins has truly earned the right to sing about life. For weeks after the operation the only words uttered were ‘yes’, ‘no’, the name of his partner ‘Grace Maxwell’ and the phrase ‘the possibilities are endless’.

Six months later, he left hospital and has been regarded as a medical marvel ever since, despite having to learn to talk, read, walk and – of course - how to play his own songs all over again. “Before the strokes I wanted to get things done, now I want to get things done right now!’ he says slowly but emphatically. Throughout the interview, Maxwell completes his sentences; ‘I’m Edwyn’s other half’, she says ruefully of helping with his dysphasia, a lasting symptom of his brain damage.

“There’s more urgency and in his approach now,” she explains. “Making music with Edwyn, it’s not like making music with bands like My Bloody Valentine where they take five years to make a record and scratch it and start all over again. Edwyn will have none of that, he’s a taskmaster,” she says with his laughter audible in the background. “A very hard taskmaster,” she says joining in.

“Yeah, I like fast songs,” says Collins of the new album, Losing Sleep that has already become his second-highest charting album in the UK. “My new songs are more simple and direct, this is my time to achieve, and to do it I had to go far and work hard. I like the songs very much.”

Collins’ previous album Home Again was recorded before his strokes and mixed following his release from hospital making this his first album to reflect on his current state. “The album is mostly up-tempo,” Collins begins. “He records at breakneck speed,” Maxwell continues. “The other musicians are used to going slower but Edwyn is all: ‘OK, let’s get on with it!’”

“That’s deliberate,” he continues. “I like spontaneity. We try to get that energy live, the gigs are a joy, I love them,” he says of his glowingly reviewed return to the stage. Maxwell proceeds, “well it doesn’t hurt to have Paul Cook [Sex Pistols] on drums, he’s not exactly a boring drummer,” and as A Girl Like You revealed, quite a competent vibraphone player too. “[Guitarist] Barrie [Cadogan] is often on tour or working with Primal Scream or with his own group [Little Barrie]. We have a pool of musicians that Edwyn works with,” Maxwell says with gentle understatement. This ‘pool’ also includes Johnny Marr, Aztec Camera’s Roddy Frame, members of Franz Ferdinand, The Magic Numbers, The Cribs and his 20 year-old son William.

“I’m not writing any songs at the moment, I’m touring now,” says Collins. “Just doing interviews and recording other bands. Right now, I’m working with The Cribs and The Heartstrings, they’re from Sunderland – we resume with them tomorrow. I’m working with this new young German band called The Kennedys - all these youngsters.”
“This has all happened in 2010,” adds Maxwell. “It’s been a very hectic year, it really is an insane schedule,” she says slightly exhausted. It seems Collins would have it no other way.

With all this work and a lengthy discography both with post-punk pioneers Orange Juice and under his own name, is it annoying to be known for just one song, the magnificent A Girl Like You? This question elicits simultaneous, contradictory responses before both laugh uproariously. “I suppose it’s known all around the world isn’t it?” says Collins, “A Girl Like You is no problem at all.”
“Well, it’s more famous than you isn’t it?” says Grace.
“If the song is in the charts by itself, no one really knows who makes it,” he replies, laughing in agreement.

“It gave you financial security didn’t it?” she asks.

“Yes, yes…I’ve no regrets,” he replies quietly before talking about the process of hearing his own music for what was, effectively ‘the first time’. “After the strokes I cried constantly when I listened to A Girl Like You and Home Again and the older stuff. It was very emotional hearing my own music, but it’s not anymore, I like it. There was a time when it was very hard, I couldn’t perform or write or record. It’s a heavy sadness knowing I’ll never be that person again,” he pauses. “Well, it was. Now it’s OK.”

Maxwell continues; “Edwyn was asked if he hadn’t been able to get back into music, if he hadn’t played music for so long, would he be happy, would everything else in life be enough? And the answer is…”

“No,” Collins breaks in “It wouldn’t be enough. I want my life back with these songs. I’m passionate with these songs, thank God I’ve got these songs. I’m starting all over again."

The role of music in his recovery has doctors and researchers intrigued. “I’m not a medical marvel,” he disputes, though Maxwell disagrees. “Edwyn has a distinct advantage for having music in his DNA. It’s helped so much having a job he’s passionate about and says a lot about the rest of his life that he’s managed as well as he has.”

“It’s impossible for me to live without music,” Collins intones deeply. “Life would have no meaning. There is a lot of pain and frustration in those songs of course and it all builds up; I’m angry all the time.”

Maxwell continues, “on the outside he seems very patient and doesn’t appear to be feeling that, but then when the lyrics come out…”

“It’s 50/50,” resumes Collins. “Like in the song [It Dawns on Me] “It’s a simple life, a simple choice / That dawns on me, reality / That makes the world a better place / For us to share” he sings. “It’s about that, and being with Grace.”

Like many people with dysphasia, Collins finds it easier to sing than to talk sometimes and it’s impossible to listen to the songs without thinking of the story behind them, as on the album’s title track: “I must believe, I must retrieve / The things I know, the things I trust / The things I treasure, the things I need / Are the things I miss most about my life”.

TOUCHED BY THE HAND OF MOD - An interview with Tim Burgess of The Charlatans

On the eve of a tour with THE CHARLATANS, style icon and British indie legend TIM BURGESS gives ANDY HAZEL the lowdown on 20-plus years of being incredibly, incredibly cool.

“I’m in Birmingham, England and I’ve just woken up. It’s 9AM and I’m having a cup of green tea,” says Tim Burgess in an entirely un-rock n' roll manner. Soon to embark on a tour with his group The Charlatans promoting their new album Who We Touch, this Salford lad has been calling Hollywood home for the best part of two decades. Is there any sense of homecoming? “Not in Birmingham no,” he says with a wry laugh. “It’s not my favourite part of Britain. We start our tour tomorrow in Newcastle. The warm-up gig went really well, we played for a really long time because our drummer has been taken sick and we had to rehearse up a new drummer. Jon [Brookes] had a brain tumour; he collapsed on stage in Philadelphia. We thought it was dehydration. Over the last couple of weeks, it’s become more serious. He’s getting it sorted out, so it’s as good as can be expected, we’ve been using Pete Salisbury from The Verve. We’ve had to learn two hours worth in a week, so it’s been a pretty intense time,” he says quietly.

“It’s as good as it can be you know. When we were in Philadelphia he suggested Pete; from drummer to drummer.” This sort of brotherhood epitomises the history of The Charlatans. Unlike almost every other hyped band of the early 90s British rock era, they have endured and maintained a strong core following. When it comes to working out what they did right, Burgess is at a loss. “I mean, over 20 years there’s got to be a few things we’ve had bust ups about, but I don’t take it personally,” he says before pausing. “I answer this question a lot and I’ve not got a really stock answer for it. I’m a music obsessive and as a band we can play anything we want to and we have enormous respect for each other; I feel like they’re me brothers y’know. Obviously, we fight as well, but we’ve got over a lot of things together. A lot of our friends from that time, they got married and have kids and this life it’s not for them anymore. They might lose the plot or maybe they find music for them is a lead onto something else like a TV career, but for us…I don’t know. As soon as we’ve done a record, I’m going around trying to find a new thing.”

Influences on the band’s music have been as varied as the twenty years through which they’ve existed with early records getting a fresh release from hip-hop, drugs and the Britpop scene, and later albums from geography, esoteric books and films. “I wanted this album to be interesting in a filmic way,” Burgess explains. “I like the idea of [opening track] Love is Ending as a credit sequence and an opening, then there’s a backtrack through the album like Memento or Wild At Heart; I’m a big Lynch fan, and I love the way he messes with a film’s narrative. I’ve been doing a musical project for the Lynch Foundation,” he says shyly. “He’s using my music for transcendental mediation (TM) classes at the Lynch Foundation. He asked me to supply some music for a compilation album or something along those lines, we’re meant to work on something together. I gave him an acoustic version of The Only One I Know and he really liked it – wrote me a letter!” He says, as excitedly as you or I would be. “I do a lot of TM and I think it influences everything I do. I’ve only been there for the last two years so it only influences the last album.”

Sounds like a long way from Madchester and the heady days of Britpop. “I don’t really see my drug years as being a problem, I‘m just glad I don’t take them anymore,” he says without provocation. “I was at a point in my life where that felt like the right thing to do. I’m at another point now where I feel I’ve got through those phases of my life to get here, and it was all part of my life which I’ve lived without regrets.”

This open and carefree attitude oozes through Who We Touch reminiscent of Baggy’s cocky swagger and the loose West Coast hip-hop Burgess fell for back in the bands early years. As with most songs he pens lyrics for, there is a story behind it. “I don’t belong here in your garden / I should be up there on your throne / All the losers worship me”. Elsewhere Burgess has stated the song was about old manager Alan McGee, but today he has a different story.
“I was in Gatwick airport a while back, and this cockney scally chav girl with really bad makeup on is walking toward me and I bumped into her by accident and she did the L-shaped word to me on her forehead, y’know. And I was like ‘fuckin’ hell she thinks I’m a loser’. All the Charlatans fans are like me, so we’re all losers.”

Renown for giving away free songs, ringtones and downloads to subscribing fans, Charlatans have always been big on catering for fans needs, whether its playing requests or giving away their last album for free. “I think the way we treat our fans is been a huge part of why we’re still around,” says Burgess keenly. “We give to them and they give to us, and it’s mutual respect in a lot of ways. The thing about giving away the album for free last time was more than just treating the fans well; it was a move in a lot of ways, it was a statement of intent like a fuck you to the record company.”

This attitude has won the band many younger, more recently recruited fans such as The Pains of Being Pure at Heart and The Morning After Girls; musicians who they are keen to work with. “With new stuff we’ve had remixes done by The Horrors who are friends of mine, and we give those away for free - more feeding the fans and picking up people who are interested to try and get their heads around it. It’s always interesting to be involved in the passing of information, and that’s what it’s all about isn’t it? You never know where it will end up or what effect it will have.”

PARADISE MOTEL TOUR DIARY PART TWO


In the final installment of his tour diary with THE PARADISE MOTEL, drummer and scribe ANDY HAZEL commemorates the end of an era by revisiting the band's birthplace, dressing to offend and playing some truly shocking mini-golf.

Diners are requested not to wear military or paramilitary uniforms and will be asked to wear one of the alternative jackets provided.’ So reads the blurb from the menu of the restaurant beneath the venue we play on the first night of our last weekend of our Australian Ghost Story-promoting tour. Unfortunately, two of our party is wearing said potentially offensive items of clothing and the risk of inciting a sternly-worded and gentle ejection or worse, wearing an ‘alternative jacket’ livens up what begins as a fairly quiet evening in Hobart. The upstairs venue, Siren’s Ballroom, is a rarely-unlocked and bare-walled room more commonly used by swing dancers and mice than rock bands and a drinking crowd, but it’s perfect for us and for bringing our take on the events around Azaria Chamberlain’s short life to the birthplace of The Paradise Motel.

By now at ease with the touring process (given that singer Merida Sussex lives in London, touring is a rare event) tonight we’re playing the first show on home soil since the band’s first gig ever. The experience is less unnerving than it could have been, possibly due to a small snow fight on the summit of Mount Wellington, assurances from well-intentioned friends and copious consumption of local ales.

Despite a local radio DJ expressing genuine amazement that most of the band are actually from Hobart mid-way through an interview (“Really? That’s awesome! Says here…[scans Wikipedia entry]…you guys lived in London for ten years. Cool! So…uh, what did you do?”), and a decisive lack of punters in their early-20s, there is a decent turnout and a largely attentive audience. Given that we’re up against Tame Impala at the Uni Bar and the always-appealing prospect of Jane Dust and Go Go Saipan at the less-appealing Brisbane Hotel, there is a warm buzz throughout the venue and candle-lit clusters of punters circling the scattered tables makes for a pleasing sight. Not really all that different from that first show, a kilometer and 15 years away.

Tour mates Sianna Lee go down beautifully and win some new fans. Surely Courtney Love would give more than make-up tips for the rights to cover some of her songs. Spending the rest of the evening catching up with friends, the morning variously playing with chickens and exploring Salamanca Market, the afternoon sees us back on the mainland and barreling along the Calder to Hepburn Springs and the final show of the tour. Easing into town around 6PM we soon realize that a) we’ve chosen two of the most beautiful parts of the country in which to end our tour and B) there really aren’t going to be many people at the show this evening. “I think we could dedicate a song to each member of the audience tonight” is how guitarist and organ-player Charles Bickford refers to it.

Numbers aside, the show is possibly our tightest one ever, and feedback from the audience is all good; which is more than can be said for the shenanigans the band’s rhythm section get up to the following day. With a horrendously kitschy mini-golf course just up the road, spectacularly delicious breakfasts are nearly heaved up at the sight of the some of the ‘features’ of the country’s only Australiana-themed mini golf course (as depicted above). Clearly The Paradise Motel’s sensitivity at writing about issues at the figurative and literal heart of Australia does not extend to the bassist and drummer.

Unfortunate hijinks aside, there is poignancy to the hugs we share after the show when saying our goodbyes, not only at the tour ending and the album being put to bed, but at the lack of certainty about the future. Can a band last spread across hemispheres? Will the future only hold albums and an occasional, prohibitively expensive, reunion show? Will the rhythm section be invited back?

PARADISE MOTEL TOUR DIARY PART ONE

Drummer and Inpress writer ANDY HAZEL tells of mad fans, traffic jams and fishy vans in part one of a diary from the first tour by THE PARADISE MOTEL in over a decade.

“It’s been a while between tours,” says guitarist Matt Aulich quietly with a wry smile as we head onto the tarmac for that long walk to the waiting Tiger plane that money-conscious Melbournians know only too well. This understatement is typical of the self-depreciatory sense of humour that underlies The Paradise Motel’s ostensibly serious work and it’s something that saves us again and again from getting bogged down in the minutiae of touring.

On the road promoting their first album in 11 years, Australian Ghost Story and playing songs from an as-yet-unreleased album I Still Hear Your Voice at Night (aka ISHY VAN) and their first Australian tour since 1997, The Paradise Motel have prevailed over more obstacles than most bands in order to put this tour together. With the cost and practicality of singer Merida Sussex living in London, the band overcoming the death of former drummer Damian Hill, dwelling on the not-unchallenging concept of the life and death of Azaria Chamberlain and heavy expectations of long-time fans, this tour has a lot riding on it. With all this, oppressive Sydney traffic and the vagaries of budget airlines, IPhone’s Google Maps and bottles of ‘splishy-splashy’ wine, this was a tour to remember for many reasons.

Once safely deposited in Sydney we variously head to the ABC radio studio for a live-to-air performance while others collect the van in which our hired equipment will be transported. After an hour of waiting, we are presented with a standard white Renault one-tonne van which utterly reeks of fish (aka FISHY VAN). Protesting to the hire car rep gets us nowhere so we leave to collect the gear, soon discovering that somehow opening windows worsens the stench. With the equipment very reluctantly eased in by nose-clenching dudes from Billy Hyde’s we make for Katoomba and the first show of the tour. Tuning into local traffic reports the DJ seems to find the main roads on which we’re driving as the places to set awful accidents. The M4 and M5 are variously described as ‘best avoided’, and ‘no-go zones’ before all but pleading with us not to use these densely-packed bitumen lifelines. After many conversations of the ‘this would never happen in Melbourne’ variety, talk of hijacking a similarly stationary Winnebago and other survival strategies, we limp, stinking and late, into the Blue Mountains for what turns out to be a fantastic show.

Sianna Lee is our support act for the tour and she and her band turn out to be great companions and fine musicians. We ape for photos by the Three Sisters and don’t seem to tire of each other’s songs. After an evening partying hardcore (read: drinking wine while watching ‘hilarious’ YouTube videos) with Matt Tow of The Lovetones we sleep, wake, and again brave Parramatta Road on the drive back into Sydney. 

The Sandringham is one of the few venues left in this staggeringly vast metropolis. Why a major venue is situated in a bare room two floors above a bar with massive bellowing sports screens and sozzled regulars in a feedlot of pokies is a sad and complex mystery to the Melbournians amongst us. After the back-cracking lug of gear, a set-up and brief soundcheck we walk out into the Newtown air, count hipsters and feel weirdly at home.

Tonight’s show is a glorious surprise, with fans driving in from Wollongong and Bathurst and several familiar faces from the Katoomba gig. With many of the quieter, older songs punctuated by shouts and cheers of recognition, we share smiles and raised eyebrows. From the back part of the stage we can only see the front row – a line of smiling upturned shut-eyed faces bathing in memories, and finding some resonance in Azaria’s story. “Um, well…it’s been a while since we’ve played here,’ says Merida smiling, to a throng of cheers as we kick in to the another song.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

THE QUEEN IS THE KING - An interview with Kaki King

About to embark on a return trip to Australia, KAKI KING talks about her new album Junior, the merits of Ovation guitars, scoring for films and her Weiner dog who is apparently ‘not gay’. ANDY HAZEL harbours doubts.

Despite being one of the most acclaimed guitarists of recent years, a respected songwriter, in-demand film scorer and, according to thousands of men and women, a total babe, Kaki King is unsatisfied with how she’s appeared in the media. “One thing is always going to overshadow another,” she says, while trying to navigate her way from her home in New York to a friend’s place. “I have a lot of great songwriter friends both male and female who are also excellent guitarists but seem to struggle with this way the media can only focus on one thing at a time because of their famously short attention spans,” she says in a distracted, mile-a-minute manner reflective of her work ethic. “So usually my friends who are great guitar players but in the singer-songwriter genre get asked questions like ‘let’s talk about your lyrics. What did you mean when you wrote this?’ or ‘Let’s talk about your guitar playing,’ it’s always difficult to excel at more than one thing, and I think that’s the key to making good music. Even if you’re not the most proficient guitar player in the world, when you combine a gift with the instrument and write with honesty, that’s what makes true beauty.” This straightforward view infuses her beloved songs and gives a clue as to how one woman has overcome the initial tendency for attention to be given as much to her appearance as to her skills on the guitar, with little left over for the songs.


“It’s not hard to come up with a sweet guitar technique,” she says breezily as I suppress the urge to blurt ‘easy for you to say Miss Rolling Stone Guitar God of 2007™’. “I mean it does take a while, but it’s not as hard as it is to write and I don’t mean like: ‘Yeah baby / I’ll love you forever etc.’ that’s not what I’m trying to do. If I’m able to somehow get both jobs done while being a good guitar player then that’s when I know a song works. When I play a gig people aren’t going to stick around just to watch me play guitar.”


Few of those who have seen King perform on one of her frequent visits to these shores would doubt that she’s doing all right by her standards. While earning accolades such as a Golden Globe nomination for her work on the film Into The Wild, awards and praises from every guitar magazine that mentions her and love from her peers (especially Dave Grohl), King has been working with everyone from Timbaland to renown film composer Carter Burwell. Though a very different process, she finds film scoring can be equally rewarding. “It always depends, it can be something where you can listen to it on it’s own as a piece of music or it can be intricately tied to a particular scene. Sometimes I’ll turn in a bunch of tunes and say to myself ‘ooh I hope they don’t use that one because I really like it!’ It can be so fucking painful to go back and forth between director, editor and music editor and get three different opinions,” she says despondently. “After a while really what you’re doing becomes arbitrary and everyone has a different feeling about a certain piece or they fall in love with the temp track etc. Scoring is something I’m interested in, as you have to work quickly, get inspired and create. Even when the people I’ve worked with are great there have still been edits where I’ve had to go back to the roughs of the film and begin again, it becomes something I spend hours working on. And then it gets cut or something else gets added and it’s hard because I’m writing music to very specific pieces of time. It’s a challenge but I’m frustrated because it can become so little about what I want to do.”

Something that comes across in King’s music and style of talking it‘s that she does what she wants, when she wants. Even when it comes to becoming a pioneering guitarist, it never seems anything was sacrificed to get where she is. “Sometimes playing the guitar feels like hard work, but it’s hard work you really enjoy. No one’s making you do it, it’s not painful. I think there are times when you’re young and learning because you really want to be doing it. It’s a challenge in a beautiful way, You should never look at it as work and it never should be.”

Renowned acoustic guitar manufacturer Ovation, whose guitars she often uses, asked King to design the 1581-KK guitar for them in what is surely an ultimate sign of industry respect. “My father had an Ovation but he wouldn’t let me touch it when I was a kid - I’m driving now, this is so not safe…” she says laughing, hopefully talking on her hands free. “When I went to college, he gave me that guitar and I wrote my first album on it. I’d already been playing an Ovation when I met [influential guitarist and Ovation player] Preston Reed. I was already going down that route when I saw him play, which was another serendipity type of thing. Nothing I do is very strummy, and it gives a very tactile sound. I’ve tried to move away from that in recording recently I didn’t use it once on Junior, as I’m sure my sponsors will be happy to hear,” she says laughing. “I use whatever works at the time, when I’m playing in really low tunings, that’s mainly when they get used.”

All we can say we have, are some photographs and a wiener dog / That chews up everything I love and all the things you left behind” sings King in Junior’s closing song Sunnyside of her beloved pet. Despite some insider information I gleaned which suggests otherwise, she professes her dog to be ‘not gay’ Readers, here is the evidence, you decide: “He has no balls," she begins, "but he likes men and he’s really funny because he’s really pretty; he’s a gorgeous dog,” she continues with glowing pride. “He likes guys because he’s always around my sister and me and we’re always coddling him, but he has this little boy inside him so when boys come around, he senses testosterone. He likes to lick men, he likes to lick their hairy legs, he always gives the guys a lot of attention.” Hmmm….